Exposing Pleasure and Pain – The Ego Transformation
The Ego Transformation
Well, I had lots of responses from folks about their desire to get better!
So, here’s the deal, I believe people want more.
However, people end up dabbling in this and that and really don’t get to where they want to go.
There are a number of challenges in terms of both psychology and actions, as well as the interrelationship between the two.
For today, let’s look at the psychological side.
In my experience, the biggest challenge to people’s growth starts in their mind.
By growth, by the way, I mean in all areas of their lives: relationships, happiness, peace, adventure, work, money, etc…
The issues are two-fold.
First, the ego blocks people’s growth.
To admit one wants to grow, and to become specific about the areas, requires the natural conclusion that one is not perfect. This requires the conclusion that one is doing something “wrong.”
So, I believe people will say they want growth as a general proposition, but when it comes down to it, they will rationalize their behaviors and avoid the ego blow of becoming truly self aware and confronting themselves.
That’s why people who are struggling with weight challenges don’t weigh themselves twice per day.
That’s why families or businesses struggling with finances don’t have budgets and don’t confront their finances daily, or at least weekly.
The list goes on.
Are these people bad? Of course not!
They are, in fact, totally and completely normal!!
So, our ego is the first challenge.
The solution? Create a new belief and relationship to your ego.
Believe that only the most evolved, intelligent and conscious people constructively confront themselves and commit to constant and never ending growth in every part in their life. Oh, AND that being one of these awesome people means you also enjoy the process!
So, condition yourself that being self-aware, admitting your growth areas and mistakes, without beating yourself up, is an amazing, fun, and healthy way to live and exist.
Then, find programs and material to read or listen to everyday that keeps you on that track.
Hopefully, I’m one of those people for you!
After we clear the ego hurdle, then we have the painpleasure challenge.
As human beings, we are wired to avoid pain. People will always do far more to avoid pain than gain pleasure.
We need to gain control over these forces as opposed to being in reaction to them.
For example, how would you feel if your wallet was stolen?
Most people would be extremely upset.
They would see a loss of money and items in their wallet, like credit cards, driver’s license, etc… that they would have to spend 5 to 10 hours recreating.
OR, how about if you’ve written a paper or long email for two hours and then lose it somehow?
How does that feel
If you are like most people, those “losses” drive you a little to a lot crazy.
Well, does it drive most of America crazy to spend 30 hours per week watching television?
Not for most people.
Most Americans watch more than 1,000 hours of television per year.
If people spend half that time, meaning 500 hours per year, working on their dreams and goals, what would happen?
A LOT, that’s what.
So why do we flip out over lost emails and wallets, when we don’t freak out over letting our dreams die a slow death every day?
Because our painpleasure controls are off.
Here’s the punch line: If you’re like most people, you will like today’s blog way, way less than you liked the Veteran’s Day or Thanksgiving blogs.
Why? Because I’m causing you some pain, or at least discomfort.
BUT, for you, this is a 1,000 times more valuable.
The exciting part: You have such incredible opportunities to create whatever you want!
Just make sure it stays within your moral compass so you feel great about it!
The litmus test, would I be proud to tell those that I love about what I am up to?
For today, begin to notice how your ego blocks you and how painpleasure impacts you.
Tomorrow, we will chat about the 5 daily ways to recreate your relationship with pain and pleasure in your life.
By the way, I can keep writing feel good blogs every day. BUT, I would rather do more for you!
In your service,